I want you to think about something.
I want you to consider the top three relationships you have in your life.
And now I want you to consider why you consider them great relationships in the first place.
If I had to guess, I would say that part of your reasoning has to do with the fact that you can be authentic, that you can be yourself when you’re around the people you identified in your mind just now.
Being authentic is a sacred thing. In a world that awards celebrity status to “influencers,” people who are famous just for adopting a certain persona, it can seem like being authentic is simply not worth your effort.
I strongly encourage you to not follow that train of thought. Instead, I want you to hop on a train heading the opposite direction, into unscripted, uncharted territory.
I want you to know, with every fiber of your being, that you need authenticity. You need it like you need water and air. Because authenticity has the fluidity of water and the inflating power of the swiftest currents of air.
Here’s how to get more of that good authenticity into your life.
The Authenticity-Increasing Process (5 Steps)
Authenticity is a journey. It’s not a one-time, once-and-for-all kind of action.
To bring more authenticity into your life, you need to treat your life like the journey that it is. You need a methodical approach to get you the results that you need.
You may not follow these steps in this exact order, but if you do follow these steps at all, I guarantee you will create more freedom to be yourself. As a result, you’ll attract that same kind of energy and relationships into your life.
Identify the people, the relationships, and the situations that make you happiest. There’s a good chance that they are also the times when you are being most authentic.
Do an 80/20 analysis of how you currently spend your time. What are the 20% of people and situations that bring you 80% of the joy? You don’t have to have a deep understanding of the Pareto Principle AKA the 80/20 rule to see this pattern come up again and again in life.
Avoid situations that force you to be someone else. You don’t actually have to put on a show for others. You don’t actually need to don a cape and be a superhero that you don’t even want to be in the first place.
Ask yourself why you place yourself in authentic situations. Is it because of fear? Is it because of anxiety? Do you not want to let people down? Are you trying to uphold an unrealistic standard for yourself?
Commit to a change. Most changes don’t happen because of a gradual easing. Most changes happen because you commit to them fully–you actually make a decision to change. It’s this kind of mindset that accompanies goal-setting. When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.